While standing for two hours in the cold on a Friday night outside of a grocery store as the adult supervising a group of kids selling cookies, I found that there is a phenomenon before now unrealized: Every man who entered the grocery store alone came out with beer. If two men entered: no beer. A man and a woman: no beer. Women of any group or size: no beer. I'm not sure yet what it all means, but rest assured, it definitely means I was bored enough to notice.

Usually when you see a man alone, he is on his way to or from work. But when you see a man alone in the grocery store buying beer, it is because he is the chosen one selected through a vote of some kind by a pack of men to be the 'runner' before or during a sporting event. This is a true honor, as he is to try and beat the return time of a previous beer runner. This feat is similar to a member of the pack demonstrating the longest burp of the day.